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Monday, February 27, 2006

Shit happens

The bathroom situation at work really stinks (no pun intended). Not just here, where I currently work, but everywhere I've worked. I mean, when it comes down to it, who likes to use the shitter at work? No one, I'm sure. And I know, you're probably saying to yourself, damn, she's right. It probably is one of the more uncomfortable things that at least I have to deal with, on a daily basis.
Take for instance, where I used to work. There were single bathrooms there, one for the women and one for the men (yet no one really abided by that rule). The bathrooms were conveniently located, where? Off the kitchenette, where of course, everyone ate lunch. So, there you go to do your business and you have to walk by all of your colleagues, who of course take notice of who's going in as well as how long you stay in there.
Single bathrooms are lousy because you take ownership, by default, of whatever is going on in there. Of course it wasn't you who dropped the bomb in there, but, the person waiting to go after you doesn't know that.
One time I went in to use the bathroom, simply to tinkle, when, gasp, to my surprise, out slipped a fart. Now, the table was full in the kitchenette, and when I walked out of the bathroom, I swear, EVERYONE's head turned to see who was exiting the bathroom.
Another time, I went to "make a deposit" when unbeknownst to me, they had shut the water off in the building. Well, I usually flush while things are on their way out (if you know what I mean). That doesn't necessarly mean that I'm done, it's just something I do. Well, do you know that you only get 1 courtesy flush when the water is shut off??? I found this out the hard way. So, I finish up and was go to make the second flush and what happened? NOTHING! The toilet would not flush! What was I to do? I couldn't just leave the bathroom without any explanation...I shut the door and put a note on it saying "Broken. Do not use" and went to find the facilities guy. I gave him a verbal lashing for not making an announcement that the water had been shut off and told him to let me know when the water got put back on.
Guys are funny about the bathroom. They have no shame, really. I can't tell you the countless number of times I've seen guys walking to the bathroom with newspapers under their arms. You know its going to be a doozy when they take a science journal in with them. Come on, have you no shame? I mean its ok to do at home? But at work???? The worst was certain guys, when they were done, would throw the paper on the kitchenette table when they were done. Please.

Where I work now has a row of 5 stalls in it. Not so bad, right? Well, whoever designed the stalls had NO CLUE what he/she was doing. The doors shut and leave about a 3/4-1 inch gap, so anyone who walks in while you are sitting on the can, can see you in the stall! It is ridiculous.
Sometimes I go into use the bathroom and there is someone in there, and I can tell by the silence that she is not going to budge, at least in the lifetime of my stay in the bathroom. That for me, can be problematic. I like to go when the bathroom is empty. Short of leaving the bathroom and trying again in a few minutes, I don't know what else to do.
And you know, it's funny. For a company that is so "green" (Genzyme's world headquarters is one of the greenest buildings going; read about that here.), I am surprised that the cleaning service puts in 2 brand new rolls of toilet paper in EVERY stall each night. What happens to all of the rolls that still have paper left on them? What a waste, of goods and money. Oh, and by the way, I use the term toilet paper loosely. Single-ply sand paper is more like it.

I guess I should not complain. Some people have WORSE hangups about the bathroom than I do, like, someone I know, who shall remain nameless. Nameless will not go #2 while at work. This person holds it in ALL day long. Ouch. Talk about a log jam. Anyways, I have got to go and use the bathroom. Over and out!


At 1:41 PM, Blogger March to the Sea said...

holy crap that was a great post!

At 2:46 PM, Blogger mike said...

Your uncles can confirm that you are truly my daughter!!!


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